Balance is not the goal (and what to focus on instead).

Do you have a goal of getting your life in balance?  Work-life balance? Hormonal balance?

It sounds so good. So wholesome. So intriguing.  I am equally drawn to and repelled by the word balance.

When it comes to talking about balance as a goal, I just don't think it's all that helpful.   It conjures this vision of a person meditating on a mountain, or perfectly rolling through all obstacles, unruffled. It's elusive. It's confusing.  And do I even know anyone who is living in total life balance?  No, I don't. And if I think I do, it's usually a social media illusion.  

So as a Registered Nurse and Women's Wellness Coach, I will not hand you a worksheet with a wheel on it and ask you to assess where your life is not rolling along smoothly. I will not make big promises to get you to pay me money to tell you what to do.  

I've learned that it just doesn't work that way. That kind of goal setting can be like a game of whack-a-mole, chasing down the areas of life that are “out of balance” and working to bring them “into balance,” only to have another shift unexpectedly and out of our control.

Our western world's concept of balance seems akin to perfection and I'm not here for it.  Because as soon as we get one area “in balance” the shit can hit the fan and throw things “out of balance” once again. And when that happens, if we haven't done the inner work to love ourselves unconditionally, believe in our resilience and capabilities, and take action through fear, it's natural and easy to feel like a failure and give up. 

So while I may use the term “hormonal balance” from time to time, you will not likely hear me say much about balance otherwise. 

I'd rather focus on more empowering concepts like personal ownership, sacred self-care practices, and body literacy (demystifying our bodies- how they work and what they need). I’d rather dial in my own habits in the areas of rest, nourishment, movement and boundaries. 

These are the concepts we dive into in our Guidance Groups beginning September 25th.  

Enrollment is now open for our Fall Guidance Groups, 8 weeks of small group coaching around the self-care pillars of Rest, Nourishment, Movement and Boundaries. If you are tired of feeling “out of balance” and are ready to do something different about it, check out the program here.